Wednesday, June 8, 2016

humpday randomness

I wanted to write a short post so that I can stop being a selfish blogger and read/comment on other blogs. So here are a few random thoughts shaking around in my brain...



My street is currently blocked off, and half the roads in town are being paved at the same time. For the next two weeks we have to wake up to the sound of construction vehicles digging up our roads starting at 7am, we have no trash or recycling removal services because access is blocked, we have to park our vehicles at least two blocks away, and we have to leave the house fifteen minutes early because the traffic around town is insane. Oh, and this is happening during the last two weeks of school. Fun times.


I was so frazzled this morning that wifey told me to bring an umbrella because it's going to rain ...and I did not care. 




She told me to bring one yesterday and I did. There wasn't a cloud in the sky until I was halfway home. Then there was a light shower. No biggie. Today does not look good though... it's already thunderstorming, and unless it lets up in the next ninety minutes I will be screwed. And soaked. 


Y'all know about Taryn Southern? Cause I don't. I was going through my desktop folders last week when I found this picture:


It baffled me for two reasons: I could not remember saving it, and I had no idea who she is. It's not like me to save a random picture of a random girl, and so I had to do some Googling because I must know who is occupying 300kb of space in my 'random blog pics' folder. And… I still don’t know who she is. I know her name, but I could not tell you specifically what she does. (For some reason I thought she was a country singer.)

Maybe she does social media things for a living, because she has over 450,000 subscribers on YouTube, which sounds like an insane amount to me... but if vlogging and tweeting and posting selfies is your 9 to 5 then maybe it’s not so hard to accumulate a major city’s worth of followers.

It also helps to be a hot girl. 



Speaking of semi-famous young women... Shailene Woodley was on the news yesterday surrogating for Bernie Sanders. I like that she wore no makeup and gave no fucks about maintaining a 'celebrity' appearance, but she sounded so damn robotic. Everything she said was pretty much word for word what any other supporter would say, and has already said. Yawn. Tris...Hazel...whatever your name is. Just stop. It's over. Get on the winning side. We'll make room for ya ;-)



My mom has become so concerned about my health that she is now offering me money to lose weight. (A long form blog post about this is forthcoming.) She had this idea to give me $100 for every 10 pounds I lose. I told her to save her money. Not happening. But then I thought... how else am I going to afford a case of 2017 Topps Heritage baseball cards? Get a better paying job? Hahahahahaha!!!

Mom assumed I weighted about 215-220 lb, and that’s right around my previous high. I told her that sounded accurate since my pants still fit… but then I weighed myself.

238.8.!! A new personal record!!! Yeeahhh!!


I'm tempted to go to my favorite burger joint and pig out so that I can pad my stats a little. I love my mom, but I'm broke as fuck and I've had my eye on those cards for two years.

I could probably lose 50 pounds by Christmas if properly motivated. Hmmm... show me another pic of that Southern girl...






Challenge accepted!


Starting next week.


Maybe.



~



4 comments:

  1. Murphy's law, isn't it? towards the umbrella situation.

    "Y'all know about Taryn Southern? Cause I don't." neither do i but i'm not into these funny famous people anymore considering every time you blink your eyes there's a new one!

    i tell you that it's not hard to get all these followers/subscribers on social media. especially if sexy selfies are involved (though i'm not sure about this lass and her tendency to taking delicious selfies).

    i've no idea where i stand on the American elections. thankfully, i'm not American.

    "She had this idea to give me $100 for every 10 pounds I lose. I told her to save her money. Not happening. But then I thought... how else am I going to afford a case of 2017 Topps Heritage baseball cards? Get a better paying job?" i commend this thinking though i do not watch baseball.

    "I'm tempted to go to my favorite burger joint and pig out so that I can pad my stats a little." i would've done it already. i suggest getting the highest sodium meal you could find to add on the extra water weight. if you're really try hard enough, i've bet you can really put on half a stone in one or two days.

    good luck! i wonder if she has a return policy if you put the weight back on *snickers*

    hope you've a wonderful day! hopefully i've not said anything to offend you. you never know these days and better safe than sorry.

    __

    to reply to the comment you've left on my blog:

    "Hello! I was lured to your blog by the abundance of Married With Children memes. That happens to be my all-time favorite show in the history of ever." i swear very few people know Married with Children. i think it has one of the catchiest theme songs ever. oh, and the brilliant No Ma'am episodes... the feminists in that show remind me of social justice warriors tumblrinas. i'm terrible because i especially love Al's quips towards fat women!

    "Anywho...I've noticed your epic length comments on Mich's blog and I see from this post that you are quite a talented writer." thank you very much! i appreciate it.

    i've a diet Pepsi habit. fizzy drinks, though dreadful for you, are pretty brilliant.

    "34c sounds quite warm...hope you're able to stay cool!" i am thankfully thanks to the fact that everywhere i go there's an abundance of air conditioners. as should be!

    take care and keep us updated, aye? xxx






    -Sam Lupin

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    1. "i tell you that it's not hard to get all these followers/subscribers on social media. especially if sexy selfies are involved (though i'm not sure about this lass and her tendency to taking delicious selfies)."

      It appears that Ms Southern may have relied on her looks at one point but is now known for creating comedic content...or something? I dunno. She's unfiltered, unrefined, and seems pretty chill. I'm on the verge of becoming a fan.

      "i've no idea where i stand on the American elections. thankfully, i'm not American." Lucky you. Seriously, the rest of the world must think we're a joke right now. (Also that at least partly explains why you don't watch baseball?)

      “i swear very few people know Married with Children. i think it has one of the catchiest theme songs ever.”
      Probably because it hasn’t been on the air in nearly two decades (Oh Em Gee am I really that old?) I had my wedding DJ play “Love And Marriage” which he said was an odd thing to request since it’s already the default cake-cutting song. (Apparently the Sinatara song is not licensed for DVD - which makes bingewatching the eps a little odd.)

      "hope you've a wonderful day! hopefully i've not said anything to offend you. you never know these days and better safe than sorry." You're going to have to try harder than that to offend me! Right now I'm just trying to sort out your story and learn all them fancy words you use :)

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  2. Even if I didn't already know where you live, after that first paragraph I would have been 100% certain you live in New Jersey.

    I never use umbrellas because I hate having something awkward to carry. Sometimes I'll wear something with a hood, but mostly I'll just get soaked. I spent half my childhood in Ireland--we were out in the rain from pretty much dawn to dusk in our hoodies and wellies. Amazing none of us ever died of pneumonia.

    TAKE HER MONEY.

    Oh Bernie. I am totally behind Trump, but only because of the anarchy that will follow his being elected. And also because this:
    https://youtu.be/TT07EhBAGW0




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    1. Only in Jersey, eh? Its no wonder you left. :/

      I always feel like an idiot when I bring an umbrella because the weatherman says it will rain...and it does not rain (which, despite all the advancements in meteorological technologies happens quite often)

      I shall take my mother's money! At least $5 of it.

      Trump: the Anarchist's candidate. If he mandates the Purge, I might be tempted to vote for him :P

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